Being hopeful

Hopefully this jackass will be working alot so I can get things done. I have no problem doing things. Except for when he’s home most of the time if I’m not doing anything I like to avoid his dumb ass. Sucks on weekends and random days he’s off. He’s never willing to do things we need to do like get rid of donations. Or take recycling. Or even going to laundry mat. Its not going to magically happen dip shit. I got so annoyed that he doesn’t take me to laundry mat that I just ended up buying mini washing machine. I loved it. Little thing took some time to wash shit but I could do at home. All summer I washed everything and would hang to dry. Couple times I washed and he said he would take me to laundry mat to dry and I worked all day washing things and then he said he was too tired. He too tired to sit in car while I carry shut in dry it and carry out. I had to rewash everything the next day. He did this bullshit three fucking times. Like two weeks apart. Told you he had no respect for me or my time. Royal asshole.

The spinner side stopped spinning and I didn’t think I could fix so got rid of it. Miss you girl. You worked hard.

My Christmas Eve

Fuck where should I start. Ok I had alot of things I needed to do. I had to finish dress for my daughter. Finish gifts for my mother in law. Cook Christmas Eve dinner which was basically Christmas dinner but day before so could do with my dad. I also need to wrap the last of the presents and clean my daughter’s room. This asshole plan was to do nothing and go see a friend. He fucks around and waits till I already put turkey in oven for over two hours and decides he’s got to go now. So I ask him to stop and pick up shit for stocking stuffers. He then tells me I can go if I want it he’s not going to get and if I don’t go not happening. He then tells me I’m shitty Mom for not going. I already know he’s going to be gone at least two hours and I need to start the sides. I can’t fucking leave while I got turkey in oven. Im still doing things for Christmas and this asshole leaves to fuck around. Not only does he wait until the weather turns to shit he also takes my daughter like he’s doing me a favor. Another shit part is he gets her fast food while out. So when they finally get home and dinner is done they don’t eat anything. I’m not being dramatic like they made small plate they ate nothing. Like are you fucking kidding me. I made turkey,gravy, mashed potatoes, broccoli,cheese sauce and stuffing. Me and my dad ate and I thought they would eventually eat something but no ate nothing. Didn’t help me do anything. Not cleaning or putting away the food I made which was most of it because I made alot thinking we would all eat. So now I have most of a twenty pound turkey left and basically 90% of the food I made left. I waited till my daughter was asleep to put out presents I thought he would help but no couldn’t do that either. I asked him to grab a gift card or something from the store for my dad he got nothing. I made his mom four Christmas placemats, two Christmas hanging towels, four more placemats and two towels to match, I also painted some wood ornaments for her and decorated with family photos. Then I also bought her a Nora Flemming salt and pepper set and two ceramic decorations that go with it which was around $60. I don’t have alot of money and I really tried this year to make it a nice Christmas for his mom, him and our daughter. So yeah just another heart breaking day of no appreciation and being alone with people around. Not really looking forward to tomorrow. I splurged and bought myself some perfume I always wanted but didn’t want to spend the money on which is fucked because it was $35. O yeah also got his mom a gift card for restaurant for $50 so yeah really fucked up. Fuck the holidays.

Emotionally exhausted

Just wanted to chill and take it easy build up to doing stuff. But this asshole has to be in a mood. He’s watching a movie and I’m in my room watching videos. So basically the same shit but different rooms. But apparently that makes me a shitty Mom and lazy cause I’m not out. When he’s home it’s usually me doing stuff I need to do or me avoiding him. I don’t understand why he always wants to know everything I do. He does whatever I don’t ask and I shouldn’t have to explain every fucking thing I do. Then he acts like I’m the one controlling what he does. This asshole was supposed to take our daughter to store yesterday to buy toy he promised. Yet what does he do he gets his mom to do it and just let’s his mom watch her. Doesn’t even tell me she’s going to her grandma. Like what the fuck I didn’t even say goodbye. I say this shit and just says your fault you weren’t up. I was up I thought you were going to the store. Every fucking time I ask him to stop somewhere while he’s out acts like how dare I ask him to do shit for me. Yeah I’m the only one who is going to eat the food. I made dinner every day this week and yesterday I wasn’t feeling good and wanted food out I ask him to pick up Chipotle not pay for it just stop and get as he drives by. But no asking to much he’s not doing anything for me what have I done for him. I told him cook, clean, teach our daughter. He acts like it’s nothing he wants sexual shit. I have little to no interest in anything sexual with him. I don’t understand how he expects it and treats me the way he does. He calls me fatass and gross but I’m expected to suck his dick. Yeah fuck no asshole. Then he acts like if I don’t do shit he’ll find chick who would. Wow ok I don’t want to be with him but thought that seven fucking years of being together he had some kind of loyalty. I don’t know why I would think that he absolutely no respect for me. Every time I try to leave he makes shit ton of threats. He’s going to get my daughter taken away. Its hard to see a end in sight when every time I try to make an escape plans life fucks them up or him. Another to be continued

Woke up to another shitty day

Woke up after working all day making my daughter pj pants I made her two pair and six pairs for my niece. Was excited to keep working on new things and get yelled at that I’m lazy and he hates my fat ass. Yeah so that’s my morning. Rewatching arrested development to put in better mood. It’s halarious and nice to know not only person with shitty family.

Spoiled

Im a dorky person who likes to create things. I cook,sew,paint sculp I’m basically into anything creative. I have many many things for all my hobbies. Like an insane amount of stuff. I always want to do something but honestly most of the time I get overwhelmed and don’t know what to do. Sometimes I will have endless ideas about things I don’t know which to do and end up with nothing. It’s a completely first world issue. I would like to pretend idk how I got all this stuff but honestly im always preparing for a worst time. I do it with everything food,house hold supplies, i bought my asshole winter clothes months in advance. I really like being prepared so when I find things really cheap I’ll buy for future. I bought all my daughter’s school supplies, school books, and school crafts three months before school started and she has more than enough for this year and probably next year. I know I’m not going to be able to buy things for a while so I’m pretty set. Made my niece a t shirt with shitty old t shirt.

I’m just really fugal and don’t like to waste anything. I have so many projects waiting to be made. Really got to start. Anyway some asshole talk this idiot waits till the rain started to turn into ice to go somewhere. Was it for anything we needed. No for some stupid bullshit. Fucking dip shit.

Cleaning

It feels like I’m constantly cleaning and nothing ever gets clean. I’m constantly cleaning the same fucking shit. I know I would be normally cleaning same shit but not on a daily basis. I live with two other people my asshole and my daughter. yet every day I have to clean floor cause anytime he eats anything with wrapper he throws on grown. I hang my shirts don’t know why I have the shittest shirts. Yet every fucking day there are hangers on the damn floor. Any time this asshole eats instead of putting plate in sink this mother fucker just puts by me or gives to me. I could be in the middle of eat don’t matter here’s my plate. The most annoying this is this asshole thinks he cleans. This is how this asshole cleans he just moves the mess. Car full of shit,toys, and jackets. He just shoves everything in bag and dumps in house. Bunch of dishes out let me shove them on counter in kitchen. Like the fucking sink is right there fucking a. Anytime he cleans he just picks up anything shoves in bag shoves somewhere else. Then I’m like where my shit he’s like idk and I find a month later in random bag under bed like what the actual fuck. He always insist he didn’t move shit either like I know I didnt. And yeah you can think I might be mistaken but fuck no im not when I clean I put shit where it goes. I’m not going to put full box of qtips,toys,jacket, and charger cord in bag under bed. Stupidest fucking this. We been living in the same house for years this idiot has no idea where anything fucking goes like shit it’s not complicated. Where the fuck are these chicks getting these men that do everything for them. Like I can’t get this whiny bitch to do the smallest fucking thing. He cries about taking me to store where I’m shopping for the food I’m making, putting away and buying. Then this asshole has the nerve to act like he does so much for me taking me to laundry mat for me to do his fucking laundry. This mother fucker even complained about taking me to work even know he didn’t want me to take car but also not get ride. How the hell else am I going to get there dumbass. So annoying ok I’m done with this shit. Errrrrrrrr