I hate Christmas. I hate having to go to people’s houses and opening gifts in front of them. I really don’t like opening gifts in front of people I’m not good at looking surprised or hidding the fact I don’t like something. I loathed doing it for baby showers and my daughter first birthday. I’m so glad she can do it herself. She also not good at hidding her dislike of her gifts. Last year her grandma got her clothes she liked most of them but one pair of pants she just looked at them and said “no” and handed them back. I hate buying gifts for people like I don’t know what the fuck to buy you. I told my asshole I didn’t know what to buy his mother I don’t know her she’s a stranger. He got annoyed and said you’ve know her for over five years. Why do people think that just because I know someone means I actually know anything about them. All I know is she hangs out with her sister a lot and that his family treats her shitty. Ok hears example she usually does holidays with her family but they left her out this year incase there kids come. I fucking highly doubt there kids came they never do. It’s like my brother in law my daughter asked what I was going to get him. I honestly wasn’t really planning on getting him anything he’s been in my family 18 years my niece just turned 17 only reason I know. But I don’t really know anything about him. He hangs out with my asshole sometimes and watched his baby yesterday but no don’t know anything about him. I really hate giving gifts I over think the shit about it. I sew and do many crafts but honestly hate giving anything I make to people as gift I feel like never enough. Makes me miss my mom she would just tell you exactly what she wanted. None of this anything is nice bullshit. Ok I know I say the same shit but that’s different I don’t like asking for anything or telling people what I like. Yeah I’m a fucking weirdo I know just feel like it’s so personal makes me feel exposed. I know that’s fucking strange but when you been a loner all your life you learn to keep shit to yourself. I also really don’t want anything I’m trying to declutter my house not get more shit. I’m just tired of shit I never use. I once got a sandwich maker I never used it once felt terrible but I don’t like gagets. I held on to it for three years. I felt bad about not wanting it it’s reason I hate gifts. We went to his mom’s on Thanksgiving and she made two pies they were good but I really don’t like sweets and didn’t want to take any as soon as I sad that I could tell she got really hurt and we end up taking half of the pie. I tried giving to my daughter she doesn’t want and my asshole doesn’t eat leftovers. Yeah isn’t that stupid. I did try eating the turkey it tasted gamey like how does it taste like this. Anyways have to idea what to get people fucking sucks.