Why

I been working on something. I started off very excited but idk the farther I get with it the more I hate it. It looks terrible. I hate it but I keep working on it hopping it’s going to turn out ok. I really don’t think I’m going to like it when it’s over. It’s like the second thing I made for myself. I usually make things for other people. But this time I was like fuck everyone else and I’m making something for myself. I keep thinking it will get better then I look at it and I’m like I fucking hate you. I added something special and I still hate it. Im going to finish it and see how I feel. I really don’t think I’ll keep it. I’ll probably take it apart. Idk yet

Errr

I have so many things planned and so many things I want to do. I have some days of so hopefully can get them done. Ever just start something an end up making huge mess. Stuff everywhere some of it done but not all of it. I tried to just finish something but end up seen a laundry list of other things I need to do. I need to organize so bad. My one room is a mess. I got containers for organizing it but idk if I’ll get to it. We can hope.

Being hopeful

Hopefully this jackass will be working alot so I can get things done. I have no problem doing things. Except for when he’s home most of the time if I’m not doing anything I like to avoid his dumb ass. Sucks on weekends and random days he’s off. He’s never willing to do things we need to do like get rid of donations. Or take recycling. Or even going to laundry mat. Its not going to magically happen dip shit. I got so annoyed that he doesn’t take me to laundry mat that I just ended up buying mini washing machine. I loved it. Little thing took some time to wash shit but I could do at home. All summer I washed everything and would hang to dry. Couple times I washed and he said he would take me to laundry mat to dry and I worked all day washing things and then he said he was too tired. He too tired to sit in car while I carry shut in dry it and carry out. I had to rewash everything the next day. He did this bullshit three fucking times. Like two weeks apart. Told you he had no respect for me or my time. Royal asshole.

The spinner side stopped spinning and I didn’t think I could fix so got rid of it. Miss you girl. You worked hard.